SheSue Experience

Columbia River Gorge old highway

“Dreaming is not an accident. It is not a wistful idea you hope will come true. Dreaming is not the stuff of long-haired hippies wistfully running along a beach. No! Dreaming is a sophisticated tool used by the elite of our society to make themselves and this world a better place. People like Millard Fuller, founder of Habitat for Humanity, Warren Buffet, Col. Sanders and Walt Disney all started with a dream. The dreams started small, but like the trickle of water that eventually formed the great Grand Canyon, DREAMS ARE POWERFUL!”

Conway Stone

I have been doing acupuncture for a few years now. I first went because of migraines. I had gotten to the point where I was throwing up and not able to function normally. I had tried many remedies over the years, to no avail. I decided to try acupuncture. I went to Olga Dongvillo in Estacada, Oregon because she was renowned in the Portland metro area for her work with migraines.

She tried her normal procedures, acupuncture and some herbs. Didn’t work. I was okay with this. It was just one more thing for me that had failed to relieve the migraines. No big deal. But noooo. This was not okay with Dr. Olga. Through testing, she finally determined that my hormones were so far off that it was causing the migraines. This and some food allergies. It took several months, but I no longer have the migraines. Acupuncture and herbs also have my blood pressure under control and helped with my bursitis among many minor ailments.

A typical appointment with Dr. Olga includes reading my tongue. There are colors, lines and swollen points that tell her things. We discuss my health like any doctor. I change into a gown also just like any doctor. I lie on a bed much like a massage table. She puts a blanket over my middle section (depending on what she’s treating). The needles are inserted with a tap and sometimes a slight twist. Some I feel very little, others I feel more. After she has inserted all the needles, she turns the lights off or low and leaves me to ‘cook’ for about 20 minutes. Just enough time for a nice nap. The needles come out and I am on my way home. I mostly feel like I’ve just woken up from a nap.

Acupuncture needles compared to a AA battery.

The more I feel the needle, it means my body is out of whack. The placement of the needles is rather complicated. For example she might put a needle in my ankle that affects my liver. If you would like to know more about acupuncture, go to: http://nccam.nih.gov/health/acupuncture/

Sometimes it only takes one treatment of acupuncture to feel the effects like with my bursitis. Other things it takes more time. And many times it takes the combination of acupuncture and herbs. After the first time, acupuncture is never scary. For more information on acupuncture, check out Naturally Healthy You with Acupuncture

Needles in my hands.

When I’m sitting at the computer, I love to have music playing. I am lazy enough that when a CD finishes playing, I don’t want to get up and change it. I also grew up on radio, so having different artists play randomly is preferable. I was talking to my son about his Ipod, when he told me about Pandora Radio on the Internet. Since then, I have become a big fan.

www.Pandora.com. When you first bring up the site, you can try it out by simply “creating a new station”. You enter an artist. It starts playing songs by that artist and by similar artists. Once you hit 20 minutes, you have to sign up. It’s all free, so why not? You can set up a bunch of different radio stations. For example I have Jack Johnson, Michael Buble, Yo Yo Ma, etc. I can choose a radio station that matches my current mood. Or, if I can’t decide, I can ask to play a mix of some or all my radio stations.

If you don’t like a particular song, you can give it a ‘thumbs down’ and it will never play that song again. You can also move a song to a different station or learn more about an artist. I have also discovered new artists. Give it a try I think you’ll find it groovy!

When my oldest child first left for college, I cried for about 12 hours straight. I couldn’t go into his room without sobbing. My daughter was still at home, but she was busy with a new boyfriend. My husband and I had grown apart over the years, so I didn’t have him to talk to either. I felt like a part of me had been lost.

Empty Nest

I managed. I found projects to do. Since my son was only a two hour drive away, he came home several times during his fall term. Then he was home for Christmas break. A whole month. And then it was time for him to leave again. Empty nest all over again. And again, and again. It was easier when my daughter got married.  I was already used to her being gone a lot plus she lives in town and I talk to her often.

After both kids were out of the house, I began to have the same thoughts that thousands of women go through. Who am I? What am I supposed to do now? I was having a terrible time making up my mind about anything, even to the point of what to make for dinner. I realized that for the past 22 years, most of my decisions had been based on my kids’ needs. I have checked out the internet for advise and found a couple of good sites that offer resources and support: www.emptynestersupport.com and www.flownthenest.com.

Four days and my son will be gone again for his third year at college. I am already feeling the loss, looking for things to occupy myself. I have signed up for a few community classes, I have started this blogsite, I hike on the weekends, I hope to find some volunteer work again and have lots of projects in mind both in and outside the house. I still have a hard time making plans without worrying that I might miss a call from one of the kids, but I forge ahead.

For me the hardest part is discovering that I have no real friends. All my friends over the years have been parents of the kids’ friends. When I quit carpooling the kids around, I lost touch with all those women. So my goal for this year is to get out and find other women to hang out with. I’ll let you know how my search goes.

The bride and Groom

It was a fabulous day at the beach. Cloudy with little wind, waves rolling gently in, not too hot, not too cold. A trellis was set up in front of 100 white chairs adorned with calla lilies, lace and blue silk. The minister stood in front of the trellis, the groom to his side. “All You Need is Love,” by the Beatles began playing and a flock of seagulls took flight over the guests as my daughter, beautiful in her lace gown began her walk down the isle.

My son walking me down the aisle.

My daughter and her dad walking down the aisle.

My daughter loves the beach, so I knew from the start that her wedding would be at the beach, on the beach as luck would have it. She was even proposed to on the beach. We had the actual ceremony on the beach, the formal reception at the Inn at Spanish Head in Lincoln City on the Oregon coast, then a bonfire in the evening on the beach. The next morning we had strangers ask us if we were part of THE wedding.

The wedding party.

There were a few small glitches but the only people who noticed were the family. We rented a sound system for the beach that came with a 4-hour battery pack. Unfortunately the batteries hadn’t been charged. My son ran around finding enough extension cords to reach out to the beach. No big deal.

The coast guard did a fly-by which just happened to happen as everybody was being seated, and then their return trip just before the wedding party started to march down the isle. And then that flock of seagulls that flew over just before my daughter marched down the isle. The next day we had fun telling people at the hotel that, “Sure, we planned it…”

The table setting at the formal reception. The centerpiece is filled with seashells.

The theme was seashells, the colors sand, cream and a hazy blue called serene. We rolled the programs and stuffed them into small glass ‘message in a bottles’. On the tables, we had treasure chests filled with gold coins and salt water taffy for each guest. We wanted it kept pretty simple and I think we managed that.

The cake was decorated with intricate seashells. The candies were made in seashell forms.

The biggest costs were for the hotel room and the photographer. My daughter is an amateur photographer and knew what she wanted from the photographer. No posed family shots for her (even though I did manage to convince the photographer to get some in). We were both very impressed with his work. Actually it was the photographer and his wife both taking photos. And his rates were very reasonable. If you need a great photographer, check out: www.MichaelHacker.com.

Inn at Spanish Head (www.spanishhead.com) is a ten story hotel on the central Oregon coast. Every room faces the beach. You enter the hotel on the 9^th floor and go down for your rooms. A nice restaurant is on the top floor with fabulous clam chowder. I wasn’t that impressed with the wedding coordinator, but the staff during our stay was outstanding. A big shout out to Mike, one of the bellmen who probably strained his back hauling all our stuff around and to Jesus who was in charge of the reception room.

What made the day memorable was the bonfire in the evening. Here everyone could relax and chat with all their new relatives. We had a huge bonfire the guys had a blast building, a keg of beer and music playing. Everyone could unwind before heading to bed.

My beautiful daughter.

I’m in love for the first time

Don’t you know it’s going to last

It’s a love that lasts forever

It’s a love that has no past.

The Beatles

If you only read one of my Reality Rants, read this one! Mothers will understand my anger when I see a baby crying while mom does nothing. When I was younger, I would turn in panic that it might be my child.  Today, I want to scream, “Pick up your baby!” Believe me; you will not spoil your baby if you pick him up no matter what myths say. I have 2 perfect examples. I have 2 fabulous kids who were picked up every time they cried and they are far from spoiled.

Many studies have been done to prove this fact. When a baby is born, the developed parts of the brain involve basic survival including things like hunger, peeing, moving, breathing, fear, and bonding. Picking up your baby instills a feeling of security.

When a baby cries, he is not simply looking for attention. He cries because he is communicating a need whether emotional or physical. A baby’s emotional need is no less important than a physical need. When a baby has an emotional need that is unfulfilled, the pain he feels can be as strong as a physical hurt. By not picking up your baby, you are telling him that he can’t count on you.

The separation distress system, located in the lower brain, is programmed to be hypersensitive. In earlier stages of evolution, it was very dangerous for a baby to be away from his mother. If he didn’t cry to alert his mother, he would not survive. With age, the development of the rational brain helps to keep the separation distress system in check. If a baby is ignored, this system will remain overly sensitive.

So, please, pick up your baby!

Elephants are very caring mothers, never leaving thier children.